FIREBLIND.COM

I flew first class to Denver a week ago, which was a great experience. I’m going to San Francisco in a few weeks and am flying economy, which will not be a great experience.

While buying the tickets, United offered me an extra 5 inches of leg room for $19 each way. I passed, but not before considering what other upgrades I might go for.

As I was picking out my seats, I wondered what terrible neighbors I might have. Would it be the 400 pound guy that didn’t buy two seats for himself? Or, might it be the foreign grandfather with stanky-ass breath? It occurred to me that I would probably pay extra to have stats about the other people on the plane that had already booked. Would I rather sit next to a young female, or a single old guy that keeps “accidentally” bumping his leg into mine?

So I says to my brother I says, “brother, I would pay $20 to be able to see basic information about my other fellow travelers. I might even consider paying $50 if I could get a picture and more information.” Or, what if passengers could link to their myspace.com pages or something? Flying would be a much more rewarding experience if you could pick and avoid your neighbors. In any event, here’s a crappy version of what the ticket selection process might look like:

You saw it here first. If the airlines roll this out, expect to be called as a witness in my lawsuit.

Edit, 2008-06-11: I realize after the fact that such a tool could be used against people by creeps. For example, maybe a pedophile would look for tickets belonging to children. So, maybe the airlines automatically block seats held by children. And, if you don’t want people to know about you, you block your information from being shared when you buy your ticket. But, as an enticement to share, maybe the airline takes $10 off your ticket if you’re willing to share your info, assuming you’re not buying a seat that no one can sit next to (e.g. the seats next to it are already taken).

I wonder if I can patent this jazz?